Speaking foreign languages with your children.

Are you speaking one or more foreign languages at home? Since I became a mother, I always thought about it, but only in September 2023 I decided to start with this project. I didn't know how to do it, so I researched to find the best method for our family life. 

I studied foreign languages at university and my parents spent a fortune, allowing me to attend countless language courses and sending me abroad to improve my knowledge. Speaking foreign languages with my children is for sure an indirect gift from their grandparents!

Like many non-native speakers, I suddenly fell guilty and prey to the impostor syndrome. I was afraid to make mistakes and "teach" an incorrect language. But talking about that with native speakers and researching the net, I discovered that more and more parents with a good level of one or more foreign languages are practising them at home with their children. According to this interesting article written by Isabelle Gerretsen for BBC, 'A wonderful opportunity': The adventure of raising bilingual children, "Perfection doesn't exist in languages", so even a monolingual parent can speak a second language or more at home.

The goal is not to expect children to be fluent all at once, but to familiarise them with foreign languages. I wish my children could learn foreign languages faster and more easily than me and for this reason, I'm trying to create a friendly atmosphere.

At first, I thought the best way would have been to start speaking foreign languages all the time without translating, following the "OPOL" method: one parent, one language. This method didn't work for me for several reasons. I intended to speak not only one but several foreign languages at home. Yes, it may sound pretentious but I believe the more languages, the better. My first language is Italian and, even though I'm quite fluent in French, Spanish, and English, speaking foreign languages suddenly and all day long was too tiring for everyone. When I'm tired it's easier to make mistakes and lose motivation. Children were not used to listening to different languages all the time and they seemed confused and nervous.

For this reason, I adopted my version of the method of "Time and Place", trying to find specific moments and choosing a place to speak a different language. This method allows me to speak foreign languages when everybody seems in the right mood. 

When I began, last year my children looked surprised, amused, confused, nervous, angry and more. Of course, they didn't understand a single word and it's terribly frustrating. Many times I thought to give up but somehow I didn't. After three months I noticed that they could understand some words, then they started to repeat some words and now they can say short sentences in English. I speak English most of the time but also French and Spanish, which are easier to understand for them. I also read books and watch cartoons in foreign languages with them, commenting on the scenes.

Don't be afraid about confusion, because it's part of the process and children learn easily to separate languages, but even when they mix, this don't generate any comprehension problem, everything is clear in their mind, it's just the our brain chooses the easier path even to express concepts. I often think in a mix of Italian, English, French and Spanish, sometimes I even add a pinch of Gallurese! It takes time and the sooner, the better, but it's never too late to speak different languages at home: do it as a game!

Sometimes it's not easy to speak foreign languages in public, because, especially here in Sardinia, people stare at you, they easily judge you as someone who wants to show off, but anyway, the most important thing is to keep going, because it's worth it!